Thai on the River - Battersea, London

I went to this restaurant for lunch on my 30th birthday and I'm sorry to say was sorely disappointed. The restaurant itself is large and the decoration dated. It's main attraction is that it sits by the river, mind you you'd never know it if you were seated in the restaurant.

We ordered the Deep Fried Squid with stir fried Garlic, Chillies and Spring Onions (£6.95) and the Shell on King Prawns (£6.95) to start. I do not exagerate when I say we waited over 45 minutes for them to arrive. When it finally arrived the waiter was kind enough to offer us a starter for free. The Squid was nice, tender and crispy. I had no problems with that. The Prawns did not come with their shells on (which disappointed my mother) and they were underseasoned and chewy.

For our mains we ordered the Som Tum Eee, which is a traditional salad made from Papaya, Garlic and Peanuts (£6.95) along with the Whole Sea bass in a Red Curry Sauce (£15.95).

The salad was not good at all. It looked limp and you don't have to be a chef to see it was at least a day old. This type of salad is meant to be fresh and vibrant but this one just looked sad.

The Sea bass was so dry I could barely eat it. Its only saving grace was the sauce it came with. I ended up just having said sauce on some rice (the rice was clearly made a few days earlier as well).

All in all I wouldn't return to Thai on the River. The food was a shambles and if it wasn't for the fact it's located on the river I suspect it wouldn't still be around.

Thai on the River
5/10
2 Lombard Road
London, SW11 3RQ
0207 924 6090
www.thaiontheriver.com

Tony's - Battersea, London

If you look up the word understated then right next to it you'd probably find a picture of Tony's. Tony's is a brilliant old school greasy spoon that is nestled amid the more fancy restaurants and shops on the Northcote Road. 

There is absolutely nothing fancy about this place though. The booths have peeling leather seats, the tables are very well lived and the walls are adorned with boards and pictures of their specials of the day.

When I went I had a Poached Egg on Toast with a side of Bacon. My partner had a Bacon Sandwich. Both arrived exactly as expected: basic and simple. We didn't go here for Cordon Bleu cooking after all.

I first heard about this place when reading a book written by an adman named Russell Davies. In his spare time Russell would go to greasy spoons, picture them and then write about them. I really appreciated his blog turned book when I first stumbled upon it. The book not only tells you where to go for a good old English fry up, but it also chronicles the fast dying British Cafe.

Aside from breakfast you can also get things like Chilli Con Carne with Rice, Fish and Chips, Gammon Steak etc... When I was there an old lady with a trolley walked in for some breakfast and a cup of tea. You could tell that she'd been going for decades. It was nice to see a local cafe with a loyal customer base.

Our breakfast cost around £3 (cheap I'm sure you'll agree). I would go back again for something a bit more substantial. I just hope it's still there. The Telegraph recently wrote that 'the death knell is sounding for the traditional "greasy spoon' and

'Britons are opting for a coffee and pastry at American-style coffee shops, leaving lorry drivers without the option of white toast, margarine, sausage, beans, chips and a bottomless mug of tea.' I just hope their wrong.

Tony's Cafe

6/10

74 Northcote Road

London, SW11 6QL

0207 228 0929


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Battersea Tandoori - London

This was an off the cuff, out of the blue visit to a restaurant that lives close to home. In my opinion Indian restaurants are all pretty similar. You get your bog standard dishes such as Vindaloo, Madras, Biryanis etc... This place is much the same, however I appreciated that my Lamb Vindaloo was hot (not for people that think heat is a few grinds of black pepper, this was nicely hot). I also loved the fact they served Mulligatawny, which is hardly ever found on Indian menus these days. This curried lentil soup was lovely, it had the perfect balance of hot and sour. My husband was a little disappointed with his Chicken Curry as it was a little sweet (he loves sweet things, but if a curry is sweet then let us know beforehand). The Nan was fine, Pappadoms too and they came with your regular dips consisting of onion salad, sweet chutney and an unknown dip which I believe was tamarind based.

I want to go to a Michelin starred Indian to see if they can do any better. A curry in India costs around 10 pence so I wonder if these fancy chefs i.e. Atul Kotcher at Benares can do any better than your local. I know the presentation would be a picture but is the taste really that different? We'll see when I go.

If I want a curry i'm happy to go to Battersea Tandoori. It's standard Indian food, and there's nothing wrong with that.

Battersea Tandoori Indian Restaurant

6.5/10

515 Battersea Park Road

SW11 3BN

020 924 2712


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Fish in a Tie - Battersea, London

I took my mum here for Mother's Day. We went for lunch on a Friday. When we walked in the restaurant only had a few diners. It took no time at all for the place to fill out though. A good sign we thought, because in this day and age who can afford to go out for lunch in the middle of their work day?

The decor was lovely, yet understated all at once. I can imagine that at night, with the warm light of candlelit tables it can be a very romantic place to go. The upstairs was small, accommodating around 20 people, but there is a downstairs as well.

The service was impeccable. The one waitress working was enthusiastic, polite and helpful. It really made our meal more enjoyable.

You can choose from two separate menus at Fish in a Tie. First there's the 2 courses for £10 menu and then the 'a la carte' menu (both of which are incredibly reasonable). I ordered from the 2 for £10 menu that started with Calamari followed by the Fishcake (all the mains come with a selection of vegetables). My mum ordered from the 'a la carte' and started with the Moules Mariniere in a cream, wine, garlic and shallot sauce (£5.25) followed by the Seabass (£9.95).

My Calamari was lovely. The danger of ordering something like Calamari when you're in a city is it's often fried from frozen. This wasn't, resulting in it being mighty tender. My only qualm was that the Tartare Sauce was effectively mayonnaise and perhaps the coating on the calamari could have been a little crispier. The sauce that came with my mum's Moules was lovely but unfortunately there were around 4 or 5 that weren't open, which as we all know is a big no no with shellfish.

My main was good. I liked the crispy potatoes and the other veg weren't overdone. The fishcake could have possibly done with a little more fish and the texture was a little cakey, but still enjoyable. My mums seabass wasn't filleted which meant there were quite a few bones, however you can't fault them for that as it didn't state filleted on the menu. The fish was very well cooked and came with the same vegetables.

The name of this restaurant does lead one to believe that it's a fish restaurant, however they also offer specials, steak, pasta, chicken etc... I would describe it more as Mediterranean. 

My mum and I enjoyed our meals despite the slight imperfections. There were certainly elements of our respective dishes that I think could have been improved, however at these prices they are doing a great job. The overall experience was lovely and I will certainly be going back.

Fish in a Tie

7/10

105 Falcon Road

London, SW11 2PF

0207 924 1913

www.fishinatie.com


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L'antipasto aka Antipasto & Pasta - Battersea, London

L'antipasto is an unassuming, understated local restaurant. The food is good and the staff are friendly, warm and accomodating. The decor is much like the food, traditional and low key. However what attracts the locals are the deals they put on weekly. On Monday, Thursday, Saturday and Sunday all meals are half price. We took advantage of this and went on a Thursday. We started with a Tomato, Mozzarella and Basil salad, followed by Linguine with Basil, Parmesan and Pine Nut Pesto, Calamari with vegetables, a bread basket, a beer, glass of wine and Tiramisu, all totalling a very respectable £29.

I asked for extra chilli as I'm an avid heat seeker. They brought me chilli flakes, chilli oil and fresh chillies (testament to their attention to detail and desire to please their customers).

The linguine was nice but rather large, however I appreciated the fact they didn't skimp on the portion sizes (it was half price after all). I had them doggy bag the remainder for lunch the following day. My husband liked his calamari, but the veg were slightly bland (ie: not dressed) so some salt and chilli oil was required to vamp it up a bit. For dessert we shared the tiramisu, which we were very happy with. It came in its own bowl (there's something nice about individually made portions) and was rich, creamy, boozy and strong with coffee.

Their only shortfall however is they don't serve pizza.

This was our second time at L'antipasto but we'll certainly be back.

9/10

L'antipasto

511 Battersea Park Road

London, SW11 3BW

0207 223 9765

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Margarita Loca - Battersea, London

We'd seen this place a few times and always said we'd give it a go. Maybe it was the colourful decor or party atmosphere that drew us in on a cold Monday night. It was empty, the music was loud so we weren't off to a rockin' start. I can appreciate what the owners were trying to create when they opened this place, a restaurant come bar with a party atmosphere. In reality though it is a little garish (this fact compounded by the large sombrero hats that are on each table). I can imagine people do put them on after having a few too many Caribbean Peach cocktails (£5.95).

This is certainly not a place you'd go to for a romantic dinner, more a lads or girly night out. This fact was realised when I saw that Tuesday is Señorita cocktail night, Sunday is a BBQ fun day, Friday & Saturday a late cocktail night, and on Thursdays happy hour is extended to 8.30pm.

The food was good though. Having read a few reviews before going we decided not to get two mains because of the large portion sizes. So we opted for Beef Nachos (£4.95) followed by a Chicken Chimichanga (£8.95). The Nachos came with a generous amount of Sour Cream and Guacamole, but no coriander to be seen. The Chimichanga came with rice and salad. We also asked for some extra hot sauce, Chipotle based, rather good, and free. All in all the meal was fairly priced, and yes the portion sizes were relatively generous but not overwhelmingly huge. I'd be hard pushed to say the food at Margarita Loca was authentic. It's Mexican and Cuban inspired for sure, but more Mexican-American or Tex-Mex.

The service also left a little to be desired. We had to wait for some time to get our bill, which was confusing as no other customers were in there.

Margarita Loca

6/10 for atmosphere, 7/10 for food

517-519 Battersea Park Road
London SW11 3BN
0207 924 2772

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Butcher & Grill - Battersea, London

Butcher and Grill is a new-ish concept. You can buy top quality meat from very knowlegeable butchers. They also sell herbs, fresh fruit and vegetables each morning. Not to mention a wonderful selection of pastries, cheeses, cured meats, sauces, chutneys and oils.

Step forward and you come to the restaurant. A low key affair where you can sip coffee and eat your breakfast, or if that doesn't suit you then indulge in their lunch promotion (2 courses for £12.95) or go crazy with the a la carte offering for dinner.

Great produce equals great food. Not only can you buy the raw ingredients, but you can eat it there too if you so wish.

So if you fancy a steak for dinner (Sirloin £17.50, fillet £20), a lovely big English for brekkie (£9.95), or indeed smoked haddock with a poached egg and lemon hollandaise (£7.50) then take a minute to consider this place.

Butcher and Grill
9/10
39-41 Parkgate Road
Battersea
London
SW11 4NP
020 7924 3999

www.thebutcherandgrill.com

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